Ispiration

Awhile back a friend of mine and I rented a John Travolta movie called “Michael”. Travolta was an archangel who had spent eons here on earth living fully, winning battles, and helping those in need and now his time was nearly up. He was going to have to leave this domain soon and he knew he was going to miss the preciousness of life very much.

After the film, my friend was feeling the huge difference between larger than life Travolta and the inspiring and dynamic story on the big screen and the mundane reality of her every day life. Even though for many people living elsewhere, every day life on Kauai might well be the fantasy dream.

I felt inspired by the film yet, I was aware of the difference between what my experience of my life could be and what it actually is. Even though in comparison to many, my vitality and enthusiasm for life is strong, still the tensions and stressors, the difficulties, the disappointments, the seemingly unfulfilled desires – all too quickly have the power at times to take away my appreciation and my joy in any given moment.

My friend spoke of how angry she felt sometimes leaving a film that had stirred or inspired her. How dare the fantasy lift her up when reality could never maintain the high? It was way too far to have to fall. I thought of how someone can see an empty old, building, completely in shambles and envision it restored and redecorated. Working hard and long with determination. Holding the vision even when no one else could see it. Until one day that vision had become, at last, the new reality.

There is an inevitable lag time between vision and manifestation. How we interpret and respond to that lag time can determine whether our dreams will depress or inspire us.

My friend experienced the difference between vision and reality as proof positive that never the twain shall meet. But what if Thomas Edison didn’t give himself some lag time to get from his idea of electricity to the light bulb? What if the man who started Kentucky Fried Chicken gave up after his 2000th rejection? What if you or I as toddlers gave up trying to stand up after falling down again for the umpteenth time?

How can we encourage ourselves to keep on going through the lag time, keeping our minds set on our desired outcome, while we still manage to live our lives fully right here and right now? By not interpreting the lag time as evidence of failure, rejection, or stupidity. By not making our minds up that because it isn’t happening or working now, it never will. Unless we really do have a valid crystal ball, we need to stop pretending that we can predict the future.

We can still have discernment over our efforts and their consequences. We can pay attention to what needs correction or what resources may be lacking. And we can do this without judging ourselves or blaming others.

There was a study that looked at why similarly skilled gymnasts made it or didn’t make it to the Olympics. The one discriminating factor was how the gymnast responded to the mistakes she made. Those who didn’t make it to the Olympics felt angry and hopeless and judged themselves harshly for making the mistake. Those who made it to the Olympics made the same mistakes but they paid attention to what needed correction and, without shame or failure, sought out people who might be able to help them.

Another study looked at golfers’ abilities to hit the ball past a sandtrap area. Those whose attention was focused on avoiding the sandtrap (motivated by their fear/lack) landed in the sandtrap. Those whose attention was focused on where they wanted the ball to go (inspiration) rather than where they did not want the ball to go avoided the sandtrap. The unconscious mind follows our attention. It does not differentiate between positive or negative attention. So if I am attending to the sandtrap, even though I am wanting to avoid it, I will have a stronger tendency to end up in the sandtrap.

We need to focus our minds on what we want rather than on what we want to avoid. We need to cultivate a plan to get us there. We need to gather appropriate resource. We need to pay attention to our progress and reevaluate our plan, without judgment or rejection, if need be. We need to feel the accomplishment of each baby step. And we need to give ourselves the time we need to get from here to there. We need to be willing to be happy right now without this thing we want or need. As soon as we base our happiness on attaining a goal, we nullify the value of our moment-to-moment living. Our life becomes a means to an end and the pleasure and purpose of the journey is forgotten.

If we keep our goal too much in the forefront of our mind, the distance between where we are and where we want to be will seem too great and we will not be able to feel the accomplishment of the progress we have made. Without a feeling of accomplishment, it is easy to feel discouraged. Discouragement reinforces negativity. And negativity does not propel us forward.

The mind is so willing to wipe out that which inspires us. It happens without our choosing. Without our even knowing it is happening. But we can choose to call it back. We can decide to take charge of our minds and cultivate that which inspires us. And when we inspire ourselves, we inspire others.

At any point in time we CAN change the direction of our thoughts. The problem is we usually identify ourselves with the thoughts and the feelings we happen to be having. Once we identify with our thoughts and feelings they control us and we no longer feel we have the power to change them.

Imagine driving your car from Kealia to Lihue and while stopped in front of the Big Save at the light someone throws you in the back seat, hijacks your car and starts driving to Haena. That is what it is like with our minds. Thoughts come in and hijack our attention. We might not even notice we’ve been hijacked until suddenly we realize we are passing Anahola. But at any given time, with awareness we have the ability and the power to kick the hijacker out, get back in the drivers’s seat and continue on to our original destination.

The mind doesn’t really care what it thinks. It just associates from one thing, from one thought, to another. Governed by our Psychological Defensive Structure, the mind does not necessarily pay attention to what is really true. It will think the kinds of thoughts and cause the kinds of feelings that match who we think we are.

The practice of meditation can be very helpful to teach us not to identify ourselves with our thoughts and feelings. We have thoughts and feelings but we are not determined or governed by them. This separation between who we are and what we happen to think and feel gives us the opportunity to assess the appropriateness of our thoughts and feelings. It can help us notice when we are in a thought that we have just associated to that does not serve us and could just as well be left behind.

For instance. Many thoughts associate from what we happen to see or hear in our environment. Perhaps you are listening to the radio and a sad love song starts to play. That song reminds you of how you don’t have a romantic relationship. Then you start to blame your appearance for your lonely state and before you know it you are feeling depressed and hopeless about ever finding someone who would want to be with you.

Imagination, however, is not just a mental phenomenon. It has very real physical consequences. If your fantasy is negative, your physiology will reflect that negativity. You will feel low, heavy, unhappy, depressed…. These feelings will encourage more negative thoughts, emotions and perceptions. If your fantasy is positive, you will feel high, light, happy, ecstatic…. These feelings will encourage more positive thoughts, emotions and perceptions.

Fantasizing is an imaginary state of mind. If you are going to imagine how reality might or could be, you can just as easily fantasize positively as you can negatively. It is your choice. Even if your last choice was totally unconscious and negative, your next choice can be conscious and positive.

The golfer’s attention, whose ball ended up in the sandtrap, was on that sandtrap. The golfer, whose ball missed the sandtrap was paying attention to where he wanted that ball to go. The first imagined the negative. The second imagined the positive.

As we spoke after the movie, my friend and I, we redirected our attention from lack to vision and possibility. Instantly, as if angel wings opened us to our divinity, we were uplifted.

It is up to each of us to find ways to cultivate and encourage that which inspires and uplifts us and refuse that which depresses us and weighs us down.